A Brief Guide to Some of the Lesser-Known Mexican Fiestas

Since our move to Puebla, I’ve come to strongly respect Mexicans and their undying commitment and devotion to celebrating. These people have never been ones to let continuous economic struggles or political corruption hinder their natural born right to dance badly to horrific music on a very frequent basis.

There seems to be a major fiesta here every week or two, and a minor one every day or two. Being a heavily Catholic country, the vast majority of these Mexican fiestas feature thousands of Jesuses being waved around like so many giant foam fingers at a Packers game. It’s really quite invigorating… for the first two weeks you are here. After that, you find yourself vehemently honking at and cursing the alleged son of God for singlehandedly shutting down the street you need to turn left on to get to the liquor store, which, for Christ’s sake, is probably closed anyway.

I realize that all the Jewish whining and complaining in the world isn’t going to make these fiestas fade away. I’ve simply had to come to grips with the fact that Jesus and all the celebrated saints are much bigger than me, even though I’m pretty sure I could take them in a fight.

Once you stop trying to resist all the raucous religious fervor, Mexico’s fierce fiesta culture becomes quite endearing. You begin to honk less angrily when stuck in traffic caused by Jesus; you stop holding up Iron Maiden album covers to infuriate crowds; you even begin to look into what each fiesta is actually about so that you can better understand the culture and country in which you are immersed.

I’ve reached the latter level of self-actualization, and would like to share a bit about what I have learned. Rather than highlight the holidays with which you may already be familiar; here I describe some of the lesser-known though no-less important Mexican fiestas:


El Día del San Adolfo (“Saint Adolf’s Day”). Every February 6th, the Mexican people take time to honor San Adolfo – the patron saint of speed bumps. Candlelight tributes are held in the middle of highways and roads across the country, where people give thanks to Adolfo for protecting their children and goats from velocity-crazed tourists, as well as for turning valuable vehicles into scrap metal that can be used to help build more churches. Some citizens dress up like San Adolfo and walk around giving fatty snacks to children to teach them the value of slowing down. The most devout take things a step further by dressing up like actual speed bumps and lying across thoroughfares where Germans are known to drive.

La Semana de la Pelota (“Ball Week”). In Mexico, when the professional soccer season ends, the citizens of this country have to wait an entire week before the next season begins. La Semana de la Pelota was invented relatively recently to help fill that game-less gap and to dramatically reduce the male suicide rate during this very trying seven day period. All activities during this week are soccer related and include: tripping and pretending to be hurt until somebody pays attention to you; watching videos of the greatest near goals of all time; and contests to see if any living person can clearly define the rules for “offsides”. This fiesta is tons of fun for everybody – the young, the old, mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers – as long as they have a penis.

El Cinco de Junio (“The 5th of June”). While nowhere near as famous as El Cinco de Mayo, El Cinco de Junio is an important day for the Mexican economy, as it is when the entire country resumes drinking tequila after a devastating one-month hangover from the stuff. On this day, people all over Mexico decorate their homes with lime wedges and show a strong communal spirit by licking salt off strangers. Babies who are born on this day are typically named after famous tequila brands or Lindsay Lohan.

El Día de la Santa Cecilia (“Saint Cecilia’s Day”). Saint Cecilia is the patron saint of musicians. Her day is celebrated every November 22nd, which is the day she died of complications brought on by listening to Mexican music. She achieved sainthood because she reportedly sang to God as she lay dying, when what she should have been doing was asking Him to give Mexico the same sense of rhythm and cadence that He gave Cuba and Brazil. Most Mexicans spend el Día de la Santa Cecilia dancing, singing and throwing kisses at Cecilia’s image. Most tourists in Mexico spend el Día de la Santa Cecilia drinking and throwing stones at dancing, singing Mexicans.

Las Posadas. This holiday – which runs from December 16th until December 24 – celebrates Mary and Joseph’s arduous search for shelter where Mary could give birth in Bethlehem. The reason it lasts nine days is that a very pregnant Mary was traveling by donkey, and most of the inns in Bethlehem did not allow pets or children. Mexican communities celebrate Las Posadas today by selecting a man and a woman to play the part of Mary and Joseph, and a local politician to play the part of donkey, all of whom move from house to house until they are finally welcomed by a family on December 24th. It is at this point that the entire neighborhood joyously sings carols and races to find Mary an epidural.